Friday Fight 107: Reflecting or Deflecting?

Every Friday, when I wake and pray, God places something on my heart to help me fight darkness beginning in our minds. Today is FF107.

How many of us have reflected on our actions when experiencing conflict? When approached by someone hurt by our actions, are we quiet while running a play-by-play in our head or processing it with defensiveness? We have all experienced situations when we have caused hurt, whether we realize it or not, but what is our first instinct when brought to our attention?

Reflecting or Deflecting?

Generally, when people experience conflict, if following the Word, we talk, apologize, and forgive repeatedly. But sometimes, situations evolve into taking sides or deflecting blame onto others. A victim mindset can cause this. We emulate Christ's love and character when we accept our faults, apologize, and ask for forgiveness. However, when we deflect and blame, we cause chaos to those around us by never taking responsibility for our actions. We can only grow spiritually when we accept we are not perfect.

For this lesson, imagine a large tornado with a significant eye in the center where that deflection occurs. Tornadoes form from unstable air. When people come to us with the hurts we caused, it can feel like a strong wind is coming against an unstable area. We can't always see the storm when we make excuses for the tornadoes we create. Any wind that blows causes a more significant lack of control. People will fight to be right; the chaos or little storms they generate are spinning outside the perimeter of poor choices, blame, or conflict they contributed to creating. Not accepting our wrongdoings is projected to what resembles little wind swirls that cause turmoil for everyone around them.

Proverbs 28:13 says, "Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy." God covered our sins when He sent the Second Adam to take away the sins of the First Adam. Blaming others is a characteristic of pride or perhaps deep insecurities. Remember that pride causes us to measure our worth by accomplishments rather than our righteousness in God.

Eventually, in avoiding our faults, others begin to avoid us. What can we do when tired of being pulled into another person's storm? Pray for the person and ask God to open their eyes and renew their mind. When we reflect on Christ's character and ask forgiveness, we are made new in Him. Deflection turns to reflection by humbly coming to Him and asking for help.

In the pridefulness of needing to be correct, we isolate ourselves. As mentioned many times before, Satan thrives when we are isolated. Darkness wants us to blame each rather than apologize and ask for forgiveness. Doing so brings division, bitterness, and avoidance.

Let's work to not make excuses for behavior that hurts others. We may not see the storms we create, but we can pray and ask the Holy Spirit for guidance. When something is our fault, own it and ask forgiveness. Everything cannot be someone else's fault; we are not Jesus. Storms bring instability, so when we make excuses, we create a perimeter of problems; let's pray and start a perimeter of praise instead.

Pastor Shannon

New Life Calvert